Smell of Motherland

flew into Mumbai late at night, the heat and smell of the city brought back memories. This was India, the land of my Mother. All winter in Europe I had been longing to be with Her again, to take part in the North Indiatour. To follow Her footsteps and to be litterally on the path of the Mother again.

In the Nerul Ashram on the outskirts of Mumbai, Amma was giving darshan at breathtaking speed. Every few seconds She firmly took a lost soul in her arms, offering every breath and heartbeat to humanity. Seeing Her do this always brings tears to my eyes. The simple fact that She is here, and She is comforting and does what She is doing without compromise.
I watched Her for two hours, standing near the side of the stage. I did not dare go for Her darshan seeing how hard She had to work, I did not want to burden Her more. I decided to go sleep for a few hours and come back around three in the morning and watch the finish of the darshan and maybe be in Her arms once more.
I always think its a miracle that I know Amma in my life. But it is an even greater miracle that Amma knows me. That everytime She lets me know that She knows and loves me. And yet there are hundreds like me, maybe thousands. And Amma knows all and She shows it time and again: that She loves me and that She will be there. Even if I forget it again and again, like I do. Amma is always there. She knows and She shows it.

Late that night Amma was still embracing at the same high speed. Somehow I could not restrain and stepped in the queue near the stage. ‘Fast, fast’ I heard. It was the shortest darshan ever. Within seconds it was over. But as She held me in that brief moment She said ‘Mijn iieve zoon’ - my darling son in my own native dutch language. She grabbed a banana from behind and put it in my hands. As the crowd pushed me away from her She gave me the warmest smile, an explosion of love and enthousiasm came from Her eyes, as if She said ‘YES!!!’
I had longed for months, traveled 10.000 km and waited for hours, for the most amazing 1,5 seconds of my life.

18 March 2007, Mumbai
Devadath, Holland